December 14 Appreciate
What's the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?
There's JUST SO MUCH. There are so many amazing things I could choose from.
I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been very introspective lately (Reverb 10, anyone?), so I've been thinking about all the wonderful things in my life.
Also, I've been thinking a lot about food and dieting and such.
So I think for my one thing I will choose learning to eat right and maintain my weight.
Now I know, you're thinking, "Um, Anna, you kinda gained some weight back".
Well, yeah...but it wasn't until after I started slacking off. I stopped logging all my food and exercise on FatSecret. I let go of my No French Fries Rule. For months there I was at a stable weight, not going up or down. I'm convinced that if I can just get down to where I want to stay, I now have the know-how to stay there. And, honestly, I'm bordering on an eating disorder obsession with my body lately. I NEED to get thin. I need a therapist...
I've suffered from eating disorders most of my life. Seeing someone else enjoy a regular portion of a food, any food, without any associated emotion is enigmatic to me. I've always had something else going on in my mind when I eat. For a few months I felt like I had broken that horrible cycle. I felt like I was actually in control. And, not surprisingly, I felt beautiful.
I've spent this whole year studying about diet and exercise. I have all the facts. I just need to start using them.
So on December 26, Scott and I are going on a diet. We're going to encourage each other, eat meals together, and get busy doing stuff on the house so we're not tempted to sit around and eat. We are a good-looking couple, and when we're done you'll actually be able to tell!