Saturday, October 17, 2009

A Bedtime Story (About A Criminal Delinquent)

Chapter One

Once upon a time, a lovely girl named Anna had a headlight go out and got pulled over for it the next morning on her way to work (Friday, October 2). The cop was really nice about it and just gave her a warning, but when he ran her license it came up as DENIED due to medical reasons. He did have to give her a ticket for that, and she had to go into court to resolve the issue.

In Utah (and maybe other places, I don't know) when you apply for a driver license, you have to tell them if you have any medical conditions. If you do, you have to have your doc fill out a form and send it in and then they approve your license and you get to drive around for a year before you have to get the form filled out again. They even send the form to you in the mail every year so you don't have to come in and get it.

Another aside:
When I moved I called the DMV and asked them what I needed to do to change my address with them. They said I didn't need to change it in the system and that I should just put a sticker on the back of it with my new address on it and that would be good enough.

Yet another:
When we moved we forwarded our mail.

And the last:
It turns out they don't forward government mail.

And on with the story:
It turns out that when our heroine Anna moved last year a sequence of events occurred that prevented her from receiving her doctor's form in the mail. Consequently, she completely forgot about it.
When she was pulled over she realized her blunder, and hastened to the DMV the very next business day to rectify the situation (after fixing her headlight, of course). She obtained a new form and called her doctor. Unfortunately, her doctor was completely booked UNTIL NOVEMBER! Poor Anna almost started crying until her noble knight Scott pointed out that she could find a new doctor. Genius!
So Anna found a doctor in Ogden who was taking new patients, but they needed a huge packet of paperwork before they would make her an appointment, so they e-mailed her the packet, she printed it out, and then drove the long and winding road they call I-15 up to Ogden. Fortunately, they were able to squeeze her in the very next day at 1:00.
Now, this entire time, Anna didn't want to continue driving on a denied license, so Knight Scott kindly chauffeured her around wherever she wished to go. He therefore picked her up from work the next day and escorted her to her new doctor, who turned out to be very nice and understanding. She signed Anna's form and our dear Scott whisked her away to the DMV to reinstate her license. Finally, she was free to drive again! Ironically, when she reinstated her license, noble Scott was informed that his license had been denied since 2007 because of his asthma. The same sort of things happened (this time with Anna driving) and Scott, too, was able to drive once more.

Chapter Two

Driving on a denied license, whatever the reason, was frowned upon in Anna's society and she was forced to take time off work to schedule a court appearance to defend her honor. The appointed day came, and, full of trepidation, she found her way to the Weber County Justice Court, where parking was scarce and she had to park several blocks away and walk, which was a terrible ordeal since she had worn "nice" shoes.
Anna found herself in a courtroom full of other delinquents, many of which had the hardened look of seasoned criminals. This only increased her nervous disposition.
As she waited her turn, many many others walked up to the Podium of Doom, in front of the fairest judge in the land. They were there for many reasons, including destruction of property, driving without insurance, speeding, not paying previous court fines, and many others. Fortunately, this was mildly entertaining.
After some time, Anna's name was called, and she was brought before the judge to plead her case. She pled guilty, and was given an opportunity to explain herself. She told her tale, about how she never received the form in the mail because she moved and didn't know they don't forward government mail, and about how she took care of it the very next day. The judge pronounced her efforts good, and, unlike the others before her, he declared that Anna did not have to pay a fine and please don't do it again. She thanked him profusely, and went back to work, where she spilled acid all over the nice shirt she wore to court and completely ruined it.

The end.

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