Text Time 20

Jorg: I hope you're having a good day!
Me: Um...mostly. I just ran out of Argon again.
Jorg: How crucial is Argon? Are your machines working?
Me: Nope.
Jorg: Typical!
Me: I know! The Universe is being all tricksy...
Jorg: It's probably Loki.

K: Is it still okay if I bring my kid over tonight for you to babysit?
Me: Yep! We'll grab a keg or two and invite some bikers and hookers over. PARTY TIME.
K: Wait...will you babysit me too?

Kwiddens: Isaac's mom is cleaning in preparation for Isaac's dad's birthday dinner. Grunting and groaning. I refuse to help because I don't respond to grunts.

Me: Maybe I can has cheeseburger for lunch if I eat just green beans for dinner...
Kwiddens: Why don't you have a cheeseburger and then a normal dinner and take a walk?
Me: Mebbe.
Kwiddens: That way you're not depriving yourself and your body won't be like WTF?!
Me: Haha, my body's always like WTF!

Kwiddens: I think there should be certain services available to perioding women
Me: Such as?
Kwiddens: Somebody who will bring you pain meds, ice cream, whatever foods you're craving, do chores for you, etc.
Mim: On call firing squads w/ pickup duty...