Dear IT Guy,
Thank you for taking three and a half days to get my computer connected back in to the network at my lab. I spent the duration using other people's computers to do things I should have been able to do on my own, much more quickly, without waiting for others to be done with what they were doing.
Also, thank you for deleting three years' worth of emails. I have now lost all of my contact information for the other companies I work with and lots of things I can't even think of right now.
Thanks, however, for Windows 7. Pretty fancy, I suppose.
Love,
A Slightly Peeved Employee
Dear Pinky Finger On My Left Hand,
Somehow, in the middle of the night, the nail ripped right off of you. I tried to get back to sleep, but it kept hurting, and then it felt all warm and sticky...I went to the bathroom and put a band-aid and some of the fancy pain-relieving Neosporin on it, and went back to sleep. All freaking day I kept bumping it against stuff, which hurt pretty badly. Oh well. I'll live.
Love,
Someone Who Might Not Knit For A Few Days...Sigh...
Dear Scott,
Thanks for using all the fingertip bandages. Also, I really hope you get better soon. Being sick super sucks.
Love,
Someone With An Ill-Fitting Regular Bandage On Her Left Pinky
Dear McDonald's Employee,
I asked for the size fries that comes with Monopoly pieces. If I'm going to spend the money and rot my arteries, I want the damn Monopoly pieces. If I didn't win a million dollars today because of you, I'm going to key your car.
Love,
A Customer Who Thinks You Should Do Your Job Better
Dear Kwiddens,
Last time you asked me to write you a letter. Here's a letter!
Kwiddens, you and your friendship (and sistership! if that's even a word...) mean so much to me, you just don't even know. My emotions, as you know, can be quite volatile, and it makes things oh so interesting, but no matter what's going on I can always count on you to be there for me, whether I need a rant or a hug or a freaking ginormous ice cream cone.
I hate that you live 40 minutes away from me (and that's if traffic isn't too bad) and I love The Bebby, but I hate that your being a mommy puts limits on our time together. I suggest she age a few years THIS MINUTE and you move five minutes away from me RIGHT NOW.
I also suggest that we become wizards.
Love,
Sistafwend!
2 comments:
1. there's no way they can pull the e-mails from the server? that seems to be bullshit to me.
2. NO ONE GETS THE LARGER SIZE DURING MONOPOLY JUST FOR THE FRIES. WE ALL GET IT FOR THE DAMN PIECES AND THEN GET ANGRY THAT WE ONLY GOT STUPID BALTIC AVENUE. Everyone knows that.
3. "I also suggest we become wizards." Awesome.
Somehow my old e-mails were never archived onto our server. Bravo, IT Department. They do still have my old computer, though, and said they could just transfer them, and then set it so it backs up on the server from now on.
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